Broken (Nick #1) Read online

  Nick was soon standing behind me. I felt my heart start to pound. It was almost audible in my ears. “You like?” he asked.

  I nodded my head. “Kadinsky is one of my favorites,” I said, as I felt his heat next to me. I could smell his woodsy cologne, and a little bit of Scotch on his breath. His scent really was intoxicating to me, but it made feel horribly uncomfortable as well. Yet he didn’t try to touch me. He didn’t even put his hands on my shoulders, or anything innocent like that. I don’t know, my body language probably told him to stay away, and he did. I felt myself stiffening up as I stood there examining the painting. Truth be told, I wasn’t just looking at the painting. I was trying to decompress, and trying to feel more human again, and not like such a freak.

  But I was a freak. Since Mr. Lucas, I hadn’t been able to be close to any guy. The fact that I was there in his apartment was a miracle. Drunk or not, I usually didn’t lose control and do something like that.

  “What do you like about it?” he asked me.

  “It’s just something visceral. Art is visceral with me. I love what I love, and things just speak to me. Art speaks to me. Or it doesn’t. This painting does. This Kadinsky is just…there’s something so magnetic about it. It just draws you in.” I felt a little embarrassed in not giving more of an art appreciation answer. I could talk about colors, light and brush strokes, but what it came down to, for me, was how it made me feel.

  I turned around, and his face was incredibly close to me. He was so tall, though, that he was leaning down a little bit. Oh, how I wanted to unbutton his shirt and rub my hands on his no-doubt beautiful body. I could tell that he had an athletic and toned body just by the way that he carried himself and by the way that he looked in his clothes.

  I had a little fantasy in my head that featured me tearing his clothes off and kissing him all over. Then I immediately felt terrified of doing this. So, I moved away from his space again, and went to examine another painting. It was a Francis Bacon. It was typical of the artist – surreal, terrifying, like a nightmare. Yet one that you just couldn’t look away from. Almost like a Dali painting, but even more nightmarish. This painting seemed appropriate for me and my mindset at that point. I was in a dreamscape, being with this beautiful, intelligent and magnetic man. Yet it was more like a nightmare because I just couldn’t ever imagine myself letting him, or any man, touch me in an intimate way.

  Nick kept his distance from me. He stood about fifteen feet away from me, by the Kadinsky painting that I was just admiring. I was glad for this, because I felt that I could breathe. When he was so close to me, it was almost claustrophobic. The alcohol was wearing off, and I was feeling my vulnerability.

  And, just like that, I felt that I had to get out of there.

  “Uh, Nick, uh, it’s been a great evening. Really great. But I have to get up early for class and everything tomorrow, and it’s another long day for me.” I actually didn’t have to work at the bar the next evening, so there was that, but I still would have to put in my time studying.

  “Wait. You haven’t answered me about the original question. When are you going to start interning for our firm?”

  I had to think fast. “Next week. Next Monday. No wait, I need to give notice to the bar. Two weeks. Tell the partners two weeks.” I was rambling, and I was searching for my coat and purse. I opened my purse to make sure that I had subway and cab fare, and seeing that I did, I closed my purse and put it on my shoulder. “I’ll call you.”

  “Not so fast. Stop. Let me call my driver to get you home.”

  I stood facing the door, feeling tears burning down my cheeks. Why this reaction? Why now? You were doing so well, Scotty.

  “No, really, I’m ok. I get around the city all the time on my own.”

  But Nick was already on the phone. He looked at me. “Charlie will be downstairs to take you home in five minutes.”

  “Thanks,” I said, opening the door. “Thanks for everything. Uh, I’ll see you Thursday evening in class.”

  Nick didn’t make a move to show me out, and I was grateful for this. But, as I made my way to the elevator and stood there waiting for the car to take me down to the lobby of the magnificent building, Nick peeked his head out the door. “Scotty. I’m holding you to it. In two weeks you start interning for our firm.”

  I nodded my head and said nothing. But, in my mind, I was desperately searching for a way out. For a way out of this building without being even more humiliated, and a way out of interning for Nick’s firm.

  Because if there was one thing that I knew at that point.

  Nick was getting way too close for comfort.

  Chapter 9

  Nick

  Scotty had just left my apartment, beating another hasty retreat, much like she did in my office when I offered the intern position to her. But it wasn’t a turn-off for me. It made me intrigued about her. She was like a cornered animal, really, but if there was one thing that I knew about cornered animals, it’s that they react in the way that they do for one reason – fear. Scotty was afraid of me, and I had to know why.

  It was in my nature to rise to a challenge. But it was more than that. There was something about her that I found extremely appealing. She was more appealing to me than anybody had ever been, even Iris. It wasn’t just that she was beautiful and intelligent, although she was definitely both of those things. She had no idea how beautiful and intelligent she was, which, of course, made her even more beautiful and intelligent in my eyes. But beyond the surface was something else. Something that compelled me to get to know her better. She was wounded, and it automatically made me feel the need to protect her. Of course, I would be making myself vulnerable, which was scary in and of itself, so I still was very hesitant about pursuing it. But it seemed to be a risk that I would finally be willing to take.

  So, I decided to call Ryan and get his advice about her. I looked at the clock – it was around midnight here in New York, so eleven for him in Kansas City. On a Tuesday evening. It would be kinda rude for me to call him this late, but I really needed to get some advice from my most trusted friend.

  He picked up on the third ring. “Hey! What’s going on?” he said enthusiastically.

  “Nothing much. What’s up your way?”

  “The usual. Settling into my new house with Iris. Dealing with Dalilah. Trying to get the permits for our animal shelter. My daughter is scary intelligent. She’s going to put everyone to shame.”

  Hearing Iris’ name gave me the familiar pang, but it had lessened a great deal with time.

  “So,” he said. “It’s pretty late, so I assume that you’re calling for a reason.”

  “Yeah,” I said. But then suddenly thought better of it. “No, actually, I just wanted to say hi. See how you guys are doing.”

  “Well, buddy, I have to say. I am, by far, the happiest I have ever been in my life. I’m worried about you, though. I want you to be happy, too.”

  “Getting there. It’s slow going, more slow for me than it has been for you. But I hope that things are going to turn around any day now.”

  There was silence on the line for a bit. “You still with that supermodel?”

  “Penelope?” I felt embarrassed to admit to him that I was still seeing her. Of course, I was still having sex with others, like Portia today in my office. But Penelope was still my main one. “Yeah.”

  It was then that, just like clockwork, Penelope was calling. I let it to go voice-mail, which was a stupid thing for me to do. There would be hell to pay for my not picking right up. But it was a game that I played with her. I kept her in line by making sure that I kept her on her toes. Which meant that I was never at her beck and call, no matter what. I knew that I was unusual, because men always fell right at her feet, so I supposed that was part of the appeal for her. And I was the master, the absolute master, at head games. I had perfected the art long before I met Penelope.

  I got off the phone with Ryan, after learning that Ryan actually would be in town in a coupl
e of weeks for business, and almost immediately after hanging up with him, Penelope was at my door. “Hey, handsome. Can I crash?”

  “Sure,” I said. “Guess your party’s over from tonight, huh?”

  “What? No. I just got off of work. Been thinking about you all day. Just wait until I do to you what I want to do to you. What I’ve been fantasizing about today. You wanna hear?”

  “Does it involve a third party?”

  “Oh, yeah.”

  “Where is said third party?”

  “Just imagine it. Amber. You remember her?”

  “Sure. Call her. Get her here now.”

  At that, Penelope called Amber. She addressed me. “She can be here in five minutes.”

  Amber lived about a block away, I knew. Convenient.

  Sure enough, Amber showed up in less than ten minutes. Which was great, because I was salivating for some girl on girl. I hadn’t had that in awhile. Amber was a German model who was even hotter than Penelope, or even Portia, for that matter. On the New York City modeling rung, she was pretty high up there.

  “Hello again, Nick,” she said, as she took off her sable coat and carefully placed it on the coat rack. She was dressed from head to toe in a form-fitting black catsuit with boots. Her magnificent body was perfectly outlined in her getup. She didn’t have on a stitch of makeup, because she, too, had just gotten off of work, and, as Penelope explained, since they were always required to wear so much makeup in their photo shoots, they usually went without it in their real lives. But, even without the makeup, she looked perfect. Enormous green eyes, sensuous and full mouth, flawless skin. Physically she was perfect, which was why her face was seen in two-page advertisements in every major magazine and on enormous, building-sized billboards in Times Square. She was one of the most recognizable faces in New York City, and that was saying a lot, considering that this was the city where models abounded.

  “Amber,” I said, feeling myself getting hard just looking at her and getting even harder thinking about the three of us in my king-size bed. “Good to see you.”

  “I’ll bet.” Then she walked over to me, threw her arms around me, and kissed me, her tongue exploring and interlocking with mine. She tasted sweet, like cherries. Her firm breasts were planted against my chest. She pulled back, looked at me and smiled. “Feels like you’re ready to go,” she said, putting her hand on my crotch.

  “Ya think?” I asked.

  “Oh, yeah, I think.”

  At that, Penelope came up to us and she put her hand on Amber’s breasts and the two of them started kissing passionately. Then Penelope started kissing me, while Amber reached down to unbuckle my belt and unbutton my trousers. Her fingers were soon pulling down my boxer briefs, and I felt her lips and tongue sliding up and down my shaft. I was unbuttoning Penelope’s shirt, and let her breasts spill out into my waiting mouth.

  “Let’s make our way into the bedroom, shall we?” I said, and the three of us climbed the stairs into my loft bedroom that was high above the rest of the living space. Once there, I looked at Amber, who was still fully clothed.

  Amber giggled, then lay down on the bed.

  “Come here, you,” I said, as I unzipped the back of her catsuit. I put my teeth on her g-string underwear playfully, acting like I was a tiger chewing on his prey. Then I brought them down. “Legs up the air,” I commanded, and she laid down and spread her long legs in front of me. I tongued her lightly and slowly while she moaned and writhed. Penelope got naked, and she got underneath me, working on sucking me powerfully while I worked on Amber. Her fingers were exploring my ass and I started to groan.

  “Stop. I’m going to come,” I said. Then I slipped on a condom and flipped Amber over on the bed and spread her lips and thrust inside of her. “And if I’m going to come, it’s going to be inside you, Amber,” I said. She started to moan with intense pleasure. Penelope made her way over to me, and I started kissing her passionately and feeling her breasts and clit as I pumped Amber vigorously. I finally was spent, and as I pulled out, Penelope came over to me.

  “My turn next, sexy,” she said. She immediately started to stroke me again, and, although it was sensory overload considering I just fucked Amber, I felt myself start to grow again. Penelope leaned over the bed, and I slipped on another condom and pumped her while Amber stood behind me, stroking my chest and abs and kissing my back and neck.

  “God, you’re such a stud,” Penelope said. “That feels amazing.”

  It felt amazing to me, too, although, as with Portia earlier that day, there was zero emotion in it. But, since it was physically so pleasurable, and these women were eye candy to end all eye candy, I got into it.

  This all went on for another hour or so, before I finally felt that I couldn’t take anymore. So, the three of us fell asleep in my bed, our naked bodies entwined with one another.

  Chapter 10

  The alarm went off at 7 AM, as I had to get up to get to work.

  “Hey, Penelope, Amber,” I said, poking and nudging them both awake. “You both gotta get out of here. I’ll call you a cab.”

  Then I rushed into the shower. The two women joined me, and soaped me up and soaped up each other. I groaned inwardly, and not in pleasure, but in frustration – I was running late, and I had no time for this. I shampooed my hair, while the two girls made out, running their hands all over each other and giggling.

  “Come on. I told you guys that you have to make yourselves scarce. I have a meeting this morning with an important client.”

  “You go on ahead, we’ll lock the door behind you,” Penelope said with a laugh, while she playfully shampooed Amber’s hair. Then they started making out again, their hands running all over each other’s bodies.

  Penelope and Amber were having way too much fun.

  “No, you’re going to be leaving before I leave.” No way was I going to trust these women in my apartment with all the multi-million dollar paintings on the walls. No fucking way. “Now get out of the shower, get into your clothes and I’ll call you both a cab.”

  “What, you’re not going to get your driver for us?”

  “No.” I called my driver for Scotty last night, but Scotty was…different. These two women still were randos to me, even though this was about the fourth time that we did this together in this loft, and Penelope was kinda my girlfriend. As much of a girlfriend as I was willing to have, anyhow.

  I hurriedly threw on my slacks, shirt, tie and shoes while the girls dawdled.

  Jesus fucking Christ. “Ok, you can stay here. Lock the door behind you.” And if either of you even thinks of taking one of my paintings, I will haunt you. I know where you both live.

  “Thanks,” Penelope said, as the two girls laid back down on the bed. As I exited the apartment, I glanced up and saw them going at it again. I rolled my eyes. Those two are insatiable.

  I battled traffic to my office in midtown Manhattan. I once again realized that I would have to find another loft or apartment closer to where I worked. Tribeca was a great neighborhood, but, even though it was only a few miles from my office, it always seemed to take forever to get there. Not that I would completely give up the Tribeca loft, of course. The vibrancy of that area was something that I craved. But it probably would do me well to get another apartment in midtown where I could stay during the week, so I didn’t have to battle this god-awful traffic every day. On the weekends, I could stay in Tribeca.

  Perfect.

  And, assuming that I ever would get a chance to see Charlotte and April, my two lovely girls, I probably should look for a house in Connecticut. I hoped against hope that Rielle would eventually let me get them at least once a month, so getting a house in Connecticut would be perfect for those hoped-for weekends. It would do them some good to see the city and really be exposed to international culture. They were so sheltered in Kansas. But, thus far, Rielle had successfully managed to keep them away from me. Of course, that was my fault. Just look at my lifestyle – I had two women in my bed just
last night, and banged Portia in my office earlier that same day. Charlotte and April would be better off not being exposed to my lifestyle, so it was just as well.

  At least that was what I told myself.

  When I arrived at my office, I saw that I actually was a few minutes early for my meeting. Thank god. This was a client that was a multi-million dollar one. We were designing some new skyscrapers that would be going up in lower Manhattan. So, the meeting could not be more important.

  I kicked myself, remembering that I almost was late for this meeting because I couldn’t boot those two silly women out of my apartment fast enough. One of these days your lifestyle is going to catch up to you. Of course, it already had, considering that I couldn’t see my girls anymore.

  But the meeting went well, as we met all afternoon in our enormous conference room that had floor to ceiling windows that looked out on the New York skyline. Our team went over some of the designs that we were working on, and their firm loved all of them, which was a relief. I was going to be taking the lead, even though I was relatively new to the firm, which was flattering, to say the least. I knew that I was considered to be a major talent and asset for the firm. At least that’s what everybody said, including all the write-ups in Architectural Review and the like. There was even a piece in the Wall Street Journal about my joining the firm, as well as an article in Forbes. So, yeah, my coming to work for this firm was a big fucking deal.

  After the meeting, I went to my office, locking the door this time. Really, I needed to re-examine my life, but it wasn’t anything that I particularly wanted to do just yet. I fell in love, it didn’t work out, and I knew why – Iris was safe. She’s married to Ryan, the guy who has had my back since kindergarten. Of course it wouldn’t have worked out, because even if she did leave him for me, it would’ve destroyed my friendship with him, and he is infinitely more important to me than some woman. Bros before hos, to put it in a crude way. So, no, Iris and I wouldn’t have worked, no matter what happened. And, I had to admit, that this was in no small part the reason why I fell in love with her. Because it couldn’t have gone anywhere, and that meant that I was safe from forming any kind of real attachment.